Five Dudes in a Fiat

A week ago we set off on a good ol´Argentine roadtrip with the gang in our overpacked four door Fiat, made by the same company that owns Ferrari. Unfortunatly instead of being the compact, four door, bright red Ferrari we expected, the car we got resembled a clown car and began to look like one when five guys, gear and food for a week was carefully crammed in. Three hundred something kilometers on highway 40 and 100 or so kilometers on dirt roads brought us to the middle of the Patagonian desert, and a giant monolith called Piedra Parada. This place is an unexpect oaisis after an hour or so of bleak desert; a large, clear river surrounded by trees beside a 400 foot tall tower sounds pretty sweet.

Chuck Norris is ten feet tall, weighs two tons, breathes fire, can eat a hammer and take a shotgun blast standing. I heard he invented the giraffe by uppercutting a horse. Thats what I was always led to believe before arriving in Piedra Parada...
"My friends call me Chuck." said a local Argentine climber as he introduced himself and his buddies at a crag in Piedra Parada. "Kinda like Chuck Norris?" blurted out Gill before anyone else could ask. Thats right. We met Chuck Norris out in the middle of the Argentine desert and he pulls down 7a! Well...he was more of a short, mostly Spanish speaking climbing bum version of Chuck... Its amazing how the legend of a certain Master of the Universe can gain international renoun. The one topic that can stir interest and a sense of humor with people of any origin is Chuck Norris.
The climbing in Piedra Parada was amazing, crazy huecoed faces, wild sharp pockets, juggy overhangs. The canyons is very similar to the mini Zion and the climbing potential is untapped. The entire time we wondered why there were so few lines instead of being overrun and overbolted. All of the climbing is within walking distance from the free camping right outside the canyon. The only real downside was everything getting covered in dust (see our tent at the end of each day)...well that and a local who tries to sell you eight kilos of lamb meet in the middle of the night. Even with the dust and the meat salesman, it was a great time in the desert filled with climbing, wine, and Frutigran crackers.
The Argentine climbers that we met on the first day quickly became our friends and generously gave us topos and information on other climbing areas around Bariloche. On our last night in the the area, we all sat around a campfire the climber known as "Chuck" stood up and said, "In the beginning, there was only God and Chuck Norris. Do you see God anywhere around here?"


´Wanna go to Valle Encantato?´ After four days of patagoian winds across the desert, going to a place called the enchanted valley sounded pretty good, so we all jammed back into the fiat and headed back north. Sleeping outside of a small town called El Bolson, in a field, down a dirt road, with no tents sounds like a pretty good idea in theory right? Well the gang thought so to, so around 1:00 am, after eating amazing chorizo in a parilla in the ski town of Esquel, we pulled off the dirt road, poured out of the fiat and passed out on the ground, well sorta. That is until the swarms of mosquitos descended upon us, leaving Brandon with some 60 bites in one 5 inch square piece of skin alone. So with almost no sleep we grabbed a quick breakfast in El Bolson and headed back to Bariloche to drop off Carl and get more food and wine.
Valle Encantato would prove to live up to its name, even with the intrusion of a highway, it is an ideal area to climb and hang out. We camped next to the road and climbed for three days on amazing rock overlooking a valley filled with towers and a torquoise river running below all while seeing no other climbers. The climbs here would turn out to be some of the best of the road trip, including one which began with a rappel into a slot canyon and featured awesome climbing up tufas! But that was in the past, and there is a full pig, ready to roast, waiting for us at the hostel so... Merry Christmas!

The Turkish Toilet

The bathroom in the Refugio del Frey consists of a 3 inch diameter hole in the floor. Needless to say, you need the squat strength of Arnold and the aim of Tiger to sink the putt. Luckily, for the first 4 days up here our bodies were working at 100% efficiency. Our second trip up, we werent as efficient. As a result, misfires occured. The bathroom provides a slow stream of water in a feeble attempt to clean up these accidents but really doesnt do anything. On this second trip, one of us (we wont mention any names) needed a much stronger stream of water, for obvious reasons, and accidentally ripped the water line off the wall, flooding the entire restroom. The Refugio keepers were not happy. We should probably bring them another bottle of Fernet...

The last week has gone by in a blur. The weather turned for the best up in the Frey. In our hike back up we were surprised to find 2-4 feet of fresh snow settled in everywhere but also blue skies and warm temps. Somewhere along the way we met up with a guy from Colorado named Gill and an Australian named Carl. Jake and I quickly teamed up with the Coloradan to form "Team America" and made quick ascents of Aguja Frey, La Vieja, and Campanille Esloveno. Finally, were beginnning to get a grasp of what the climbing up here is really like...Bold, adventurous, and exciting. The rhythmn has become waking up at the crack of 9, choking down some crackers and dulce de leche, heading out for a long approach, climbing, then coming back for dinner. Right now, Im finishing up this post from El Bolson. Weve rented a car and spent the last 3 days in Piedra Parada and are on our way to Valle Encantado. Ill give an update no this past week after returning to Bariloche. Until then....Merry Christmas!

Wind, Snow, and Torre Principal

"Its snowing sideways dude! LET ME IN!" This was my wake up call to Jake yesterday morning. For the last four days we have been living up in the Frey attempting to climb. Who knew Patagonia was so cold and windy? It seemed like a great idea to have seperate tents to give us each our own space. I guess a 3 season REI tent isnt made for a Patagonian summer. My own (Brandon) wake up call was the wind blowing blowing my tent and one of the poles smacking me in the face. Although, the weather hasnt always been so bad and the hike up is amazing.



Before hiking up to the Frey we met a frenchman named Jerome with whom weve been hanging out with ever since. His french-ness and tireless sense of humor have kept Jake and I from killing each other. He has conformed quite well to the stereotype of french climbers loving sport climbing and not understanding why we would "tradclimb" yet enjoys ice climbing and has climbed big mountains around Europe and even in Kyrgistan. Our first attempt to climb together as an international 3 man super team started in a snow storm and ended in defeat (and a snowstorm). After one pitch of sideways snow and wet cracks all three of us decided that the numb fingers and toes were no longer enjoyable and bailed (later found out this was likely the windiest climb in the area). After this, hiking and reading occupied our time until night came. The next day dawned much nicer and soon our plans to climb a lower tower were changed when one of the local argentine climber asked if we would like to climb Torre Principal, the tallest peak in the surrounding area and a sweet looking tower in itself. A hour plus hike with some snow traversing led to the base of the route. Five pitches of fun climbing, including a unique "ice-cave", led to an incredible summit with spectacular views of the massive dormant volcano "El Tronador", the mountains of eastern Chile and the approaching snowstorms. The next day(yesterday) we hiked back down to Bariloche to resupply on food,wine, and stoke. After the weather passes, it looks like we will return to the Frey then head to the sport climbing areas of Piedra Parada and Valle Encontado with Jerome and an Aussie.